I had set a goal to post once each week, but I spent last week caring for my little-engine-that-could of a Macbook. My hard drive finally reached its limit and I spent actual hours transferring things to an external hard drive like I should have done two years ago. Really, I spent most of the time learning how exactly to use an external hard drive. I am proud to announce that I am now a self-taught mild computer storage problem fixer, no thanks to the advice from my husband when I asked him how to do it (“You just plug it in, Bailey”).
Long story short, I didn’t forget. In fact, this is what I really I felt like I should share next, since they're basically the reason this whole thing exists. Being a mom, their mom, is what makes me want to freeze time for other families in the form of photos.
If you follow me on my personal instagram, you know that I share little snippets here and there of the (largely absurd, but delightful) things that my older daughter says. I started doing it just to have a record of the things she’s told me, but I’ve received many messages since then expressing how happy she’s made others. She’s a big ball of light, and she has been that way since the very beginning.
Cody and I were going about our lives in the nonchalant way most early 20-somethings do, and then there was Q. Her existence shook away every ounce of security I thought existed- our plans, living arrangements, our financial situation. She made us stretch and grow in every way. I labored long and hard (like, loonngggg, you guys) to bring her into the world, and I think she was just teaching me what it’s like to be a mom; just how much I’m capable of being able to bend for another person.
She continues to teach me, too. She’s funny and generous and so emotionally intuitive that it almost knocks me over sometimes. Her busy body is matched by her busy mind, but her light is what grabs me the most.
Because Q had been such a surprise, we took some time to get our wits about ourselves before adding a sibling. We knew that we’d eventually want another, but we were perfectly happy waiting until we felt ready. Then we had B.
Baby B, so far, seems to be a slice of actual Heaven. She’s the most easygoing baby. She’s happy just to be a part of the action, even if that means being drawn on with marker by her older sister, or barked at because “she’s actually a puppy, Mom.” Her happy chirps and chatter have led me to calling her my 'little bird,' hence the blog's name. She generally sleeps well, eats well, and tolerates our circus’s antics. She took a heck of a lot less time and drama to deliver, too. Where Q showed me that I was capable of being a mother, B makes me feel like I’m succeeding.
It has been such a gift to watch them learn about each other. Q goes about her day like before but stops every now and then to dote on B, and B watches Q with total attention whenever she’s near. Now that there are two of them, I appreciate each of them more in different ways. I feel more aware of and grateful for the things that Q is old enough to do independently, and I’m taking more time to savor the dependence on me that a baby requires. My hands definitely feel more full, but my heart also feels more fulfilled.